Monday, October 18, 2004


When I was 16, I went to Bible Camp. I learned many things there. I learned that the Anti-Christ was now a teen-ager, growing up among us. (!?) I also learned that the boy and girl counselors (19 year olds) had a 'special" bible study after lights out. I learned what a sauna was when I went on a field trip into the Finnish town of Menahga, Minnesota. I learned that if you shared a Slow-Poke taffy-on-a-stick sucker with a beautiful 6 foot tall girl named Barb girl germs were okay. (After you had been working on that thing for a few minutes it got very warm and gooey.)

One night I got caught outdoors after lights out, trying to wake up Barb (who never did wake up.) The next day I learned that my heart was full of lust, that I was evil, and headed straight for hell. I knew the first part already, I didn't believe the second, and I may yet end up in hell but the path has fortunately been meandering. I think I’ve missed my chance for the Anti-Christ job.

By Professor Batty


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