Saturday, September 16, 2006

You May Already Be a Weiner!

Scratch-offs

For some unfathomable reason, I was in a panic today about some scratch-off lottery tickets that I had received last summer for my birthday. I searched the usual litter dumps in the house (kitchen counter, magazine basket, beneath the couch, etc.,) and finally found it on top of the piano (where I had left it.) I never buy these things, to tell the truth, I don't really understand how they work. I mean, you pay one or two or three dollars for a chance to win one or two or three dollars? Give me the Powerball, a dollar ticket could bring you a hundred million dollars! Not very likely, but then the chance of me winnning anything on these things just about as good. I scrutinized them carefully, but then realized there was a code number written on the card that said how much, if anything, you won. I won a few bucks on twenty-five dollars worth of tickets. The gift that keeps on giving. I was already a weiner, this episode definitely proves it.

By Professor Batty



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