In elementary school we were both a "Jenny Lind" kid- and she attended same schools as me throughout our childhood. In junior high she grew into a subtle beauty, in high school she was simply stunning. I felt her to be unapproachable in someway, that was just one of my many hang-ups. After forty years, I realized that it was finally time to break the ice. Our conversation was pleasant and unforced. The usual topics were brought up: kids, career and marriage. She had been recently divorced, but she didn't seem bitter, I sensed that it was something of a liberation for her.
It occurred to me that in any successful marriage there is a big element of chance that helps to shape the final outcome. I'm not talking about abusive relationships, there are plenty of those that fail, but the union of two honest, well meaning individuals. What is the chance of getting a certain color of gumball in a gumball machine? What is the chance of getting two in a row? Or three? Multiply that chance by a hundred (or a thousand) and you start to get in the vicinity of the number of variables in a marriage . So many things, internal and external, can challenge the bond. And when the bond is broken? It can be repaired, but the chances go down even further.
Nevertheless, most of us still fall in love, get married (in some form or another) and life goes on. For many of us it works. No one has a secret formula, you just try it. To try and fail is better than not to try. It can work, and if doesn't work the first time, or if it doesn't work for a lifetime, that is alright as well.
All is full of love.