The Weight

Take a load off Fanny,
take a load for free...
Take a load off Fanny,
and put the load right on me...
-J.R. Robertson

Man, nothing could get me down today; I flew into work singing, breezed through my shift on overdrive, came home, made supper for the Weaver, and I still felt great. Now it's not that I am never down, and it's not that I had any particular reason for my happiness, it was just a great day. So, in light of that, I give you this no-obligation proposition:
I am now accepting and will willingly bear your burdens, funks, foul moods, and any of your other minor ailings. Com'on! Pile 'em up! Here's a chance to drop some of that baggage that you've been carrying around. I promise not to give it back! A deal like this won't last long- act now! That old heartbreak? Give it here. A sense of not belonging? Drop it off pal, no prob. Feel that you can't talk when you really need to? I'll pry that cat off your tongue. Feeling a little better? Good. That's all there is to it! LET IT ALL HANG OUT! I saw that little smile! You don't have to suffer like that- let it be me. Self esteem issues? You're alright by me. I've got Karma to burn, baby, burn- toss your bad vibes on my pyre. It's here. It's now. It's free. It's just for you. Why do I do it? Because I like your style and I hate to see it cramped. Now go'on. Have a ball. It's your turn. I'm bleeding.